Why I hate hair salons

I hate hair salons. I really do. I don't think I've ever been to one and felt comfortable. Here's the thing, my mom has always taken me to really snooty hair salons. Like the type that are all fancy and high fashiony with really skinny over made up model chicks walking around in huge heels. I don't really have a problem with those things but its just not my element. I'm veeeery low maintenance. I usually don't wear much make up and I don't really care for appearances. So when I walk into one of those hair salons...I just feel out of place. So I went to get a hair cut on saturday and of course my mom wanted me to go to one of those hair salons.
I get there and I instantly feel really tense. One of these things is not like the other! You know what I mean? The guy asks me what I want and I just tell him I want my ends cut. He looks at me like I'm speaking chinese and says "uh....okay". Like, he's in shock that I don't want the Posh or the Beckham or the Rachel...or whatever is in style for the next five minutes. So he procedes to cut my hair and start making small talk, "your kinda a hippy, right?". Eh....do I look THAT grungy? And then of course he says the dreaded, "you know, you've got a pretty face...you just need to lose weight". Uhm....thanks? Look, I get it...I need to lose weight. My dad is a cardiologist, you think I don't get enough crap from him? My mom is one of those middle aged hipsters that's compulsively obsessed with looks....trust me, I get ENOUGH crap from her. I don't need YOU, Mr. hair salon guy, to tell me what I need to do!....I mean, I didn't say any of that....But I certainly thought it...and its the thought that counts!